“I’m wearing a chastity belt” she said impenetrably.

Ten years ago in a creative writing class, the tutor, Colin Archer, asked us to write sentences using some “appropriate adverbs”. Here’s a selection of what we came up with plus a few I’ve added more recently.

“Put that gun down,” she said disarmingly.

“Our depth charges missed the target Sir,” he said submissively.

“I can’t bear to cut the poor grass,” said the gardener forlornly.

“F-Off,” said the truck driver truculently.

“I’m fat,” said the woman expansively.

“I’m overweight too, but I do so love sweets,” said her friend candidly.

“That is nearly a poem,” said Colin subversively.

“You never forget your first stag hunt,” said the hunter endearingly.

“Viagra is ineffective for older men,” she said witheringly.

“Oh no it isn’t,” he replied stiffly.

“We certainly do not use Paxo Madam,” said the taxidermist stuffily.

“This milk is tepid,” she declared warmly.

“I’m a carpenter,” he replied woodenly.

“This lamp could do with a good polish,” he said genially.

“Pens down,” said the invigilator testily.

“That Sherman is just a heap of tin,” snorted the General cantankerously.

“Incompetent fool,” said the Consultant Surgeon cuttingly.

“If you do it that way you’ll kill the patient,” said the Surgeon incisively.

“May as well switch the machine off,” added the Surgeon half-heartedly.

“This tyre needs inflating,” said the motorist despairingly.

“I’ve never lost a ship yet,” boasted the Admiral recklessly.

“Where are my cufflinks?” he demanded shirtily.

“I hate having my photo taken,” he said snappily.

‘How’s tricks?’ he asked wistfully.

“I get great pleasure from my flock,” the farmer confided sheepishly.

“I think I’ve got measles,” he said rashly.

“That’s funny,” she smiled infectiously, “so have I.”

“I’ve never sprained my ankle before,” she said limply.

“But my ear itched,” said the little Dutch boy wetly.

“It’s quite definitely a mongrel” said the Crufts Judge doggedly.

“Pick me up, butterfingers,” said Jane Torvill to Christopher Dean icily.

“Doctor, I’ve got a nasty cough,” he said phlegmatically.

“I can see your bum,” he shouted cheekily.

“This chain isn’t quite finished,” she said lack-a-daisically.

“I fell in the river in Paris,” she said insanely.

“That’s mutiny Mr Christian,” he said blithely.

Have a go and send them to me. Warning – it’s a bit addictive (he said, needily).